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Welcome to Mania Madness! We’re taking the concepts of March Madness and Wrestlemania (the two best things about March, apologies to the Irish), and mashing them together. What we have here is the ultimate Pro-Wrestling fantasy matchup. Our writers have argued, debated and voted over the 64 best to ever step into the squared circle. We then seeded them based on a variety of factors, to give you the wrestling tournament we all deserve.
We begin here witht the round of 64. More rounds will be released in the coming weeks. But all roads lead to the title.
Editor’s note: A few names were left out of the pool of 64 due to incidents that occurred outside of wrestling. We have chosen not to acknowledge those individuals, nor will we name them here. Just know that if you think we missed someone obvious, it’s more likely we made a conscious decision to omit them.
#1. Hulk Hogan vs. #16. Goldust
Hogan and Goldust start circling each other like two lions trying to figure each other out. They lock up and early on Hogan’s strength is on display as he tosses Rhodes into the apron. Goldust ducks a lariat by Hogan and comes back with a clothesline of his own. Goldust seemed to have the momentum to no avail, as he was a victim of a Hulkamania leg drop and pinned.
Winner: Hulk Hogan
Match Time – 12:43
#8. Edge vs. #9. Mr. Perfect
Edge and Mr. Perfect come out with action being methodical between the two. Edge then gains the upper hand with a flurry of punches but Perfect rakes the eyes of the Rated R Superstar. Perfect rebounds off the apron to attack the disoriented Edge who lands a spinebuster that lays Perfect out. As Perfect tries to regain his bearings, Edge tunes up a spear in the opposite corner. Perfect dodges it and Edge goes flying into the turnbuckle. Perfect then lands a beautiful Perfect-plex and pins the Rated R Superstar to claim victory.
Winner: Mr. Perfect
Match Time – 28:34
#5. Goldberg vs. #12. Owen Hart
Hart comes out early and seizes control of the match. Taking it to the larger Goldberg he goes to work, picking him apart with methodical precision. Sensing the momentum, Hart goes for a flying body press that Goldberg dodges. Goldberg then goes on a flurry with a sequence of clotheslines, and a big boot that leads into a spinebuster. This spells the end as Goldberg lines up his signature spear and claims victory over Hart.
Match Time – 16:43
#4. Brock Lesnar vs. #13. Bob Backlund
Lesnar and Backlund go at each other with flurries of punches in the middle of the ring. The two then run and bounce off the ropes, meeting in a thunderous collision that sees Backlund sent to the mat. Lesnar methodically stomps on the downed Backlund, but the ever resourceful Backlund grabs the ankle of Lesnar, tripping him. Backlund attempts to lock in a chicken-wing crossface. The attempt is not successful as Lesnar powers out of the hold and performs a powerful belly to back suplex. Lesnar then locks in a devastating Kimura that ends the match by submission.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
Match Time – 13:45
#6. Macho Man Randy Savage vs. #11. Superstar Billy Graham
It doesn’t get any better as far as promo goes for this match. At the onset, Macho Man rushes Superstar, but Graham grabs up Savage in a vice grip of a bear hug. In an exhibition of pure power, Graham parades Savage around the ring. Savage screams in pain as Graham tightens the squeeze. Savage breaks out with a series of sharp elbows to Graham’s head. Sensing Superstar’s fatigue, Savage goes on the offense with a sequence of flying clotheslines and a power slam that dazes Graham. Macho Man then delivers a diving elbow to Graham’s chest and covers to win.
Winner: Randy Savage
Match Time – 26:12
#3. Yokozuna vs. #14. Batista
Batista comes out against the behemoth that is Yokozuna swinging. A spear, a clothesline, another spear…Yokozuna doesn’t budge. Yokozuna throws Batista outside the ring after another failed clothesline attempt. The battle rages with Yokozuna controlling the pace outside for most of the action. Batista ducks a lariat from Yokozuna that hits Mr. Fuji. As the referee tends to Fuji, Batista picks up the Fuji’s flag and goes to town on Yokozuna. He lines up a spear, cutting Yokozuna in half and covers him for the win.
Match Time – 18:28
#7. Kevin Nash vs. #10. Roman Reigns
The Tribal Chief and The Diesel meet in a battle of power. The two exchange clotheslines, slams and combinations that have both laboring. Nash gets a head of steam and delivers a massive lariat to Reigns in the corner. Nash goes to work on Reigns sending shot after shot that crumbles the Chief in the corner. Nash drags Reigns to the middle of the ring and attempts to deliver the coup de grâce with a Jackknife Powerbomb. Reigns fights out with a flurry of punches to Nash’s head. Reigns then delivers a Superman punch that drops the Diesel. Reigns lines up a spear and the match is over.
Winner: Roman Reigns
Match Time – 21:54
#2. Bret Hart vs. #15. Big Show
Big Show starts the match imposing his will on the smaller Bret Hart early. Show cuts the ring in half and wails on Hart in the corner with a flurry of chest chops and knees. Show gets the crowd going with a thunderous yell as he tunes up a spear. The ever crafty Hart dodges it and goes to work on the knees and lower back the giant. Big Show recovers and lifts Hart into the air for a chokeslam. Hart fights out of the hold, into a DDT! Hart submits Show with a gruesome sharpshooter.
Winner: Bret Hart
Match Time – 23:15