Mania Madness – Round Of 16: McMahon Region

Welcome to Mania Madness! We’re taking the concepts of March Madness and Wrestlemania (the two best things about March, apologies to the Irish), and mashing them together. What we have here is the ultimate Pro-Wrestling fantasy matchup. Our writers have argued, debated and voted over the 64 best to ever step into the squared circle. We then seeded them based on a variety of factors, to give you the wrestling tournament we all deserve.

We begin here witht the round of 64. More rounds will be released in the coming weeks. But all roads lead to the title.

Editor’s note: A few names were left out of the pool of 64 due to incidents that occurred outside of wrestling. We have chosen not to acknowledge those individuals, nor will we name them here. Just know that if you think we missed someone obvious, it’s more likely we made a conscious decision to omit them.


#1. Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. # 16. The Iron Sheik

Iron Sheik enters the ring and grabs a mic and starts to talk about how bad the taste of American beer is and how beer tastes better in Iran. The glass breaks and the crowd goes wild as Stone Cold walks down the aisle in an extremely bad mood. Austin enters the ring, throws up a pair of middle fingers and hits Sheik with the Stone Cold Stunner and pins him in record time.

Winner: Stone Cold Steve Austin

Match Time: 0:19


#8. A.J Styles vs. #9. Ted Dibiase

Both men enter the ring and Diabase started to wear down Styles with a series of backbreakers and gut wrench suplexes. The Million Dollar Man’s attempts to keep the high flying Styles grounded was almost executed to perfection until Diabase attempted his diving elbow drop and missed, allowing Styles enough time to regain his strength in order to hit the Million Dollar Man with the Styles Clash.

Winner: A.J Styles

Match Time: 11:56


#5. Eddie Guerrero vs. #12. Kenny Omega

In one of the most anticipated matches in the bracket, the two wrestlers not only got some of the largest pops on the way to the ring, but the fans were cheering “fight forever” three minutes into the match. After a series of crowd pleasing aerial and ground moves from both, Guerrero’s three amigos set him up for the frog splash. On the top rope, Don Callis distracted Guerrero and “The Elite” members the Young Bucks landed a pair of super kicks allowing Omega to land his V-Trigger and One Winged Angel combination, pinning Latino Heat.

Winner: Kenny Omega

Match Time: 29:38


#4. Dusty Rhodes vs. #13. JBL

JBL used his strength and ring smarts to keep Dusty at bay for over half of the match. JBL was ready to set Rhodes up for his Clothesline from Hell, when Rhodes ducked and landed his bionic elbow. That counter changed the match, as Rhodes landed his running elbow drop and pinned the financial guru in the center of the ring.

Winner: Dusty Rhodes

Match Time: 12:19


#6. Rob Van Dam vs. #11. Ravishing Rick Rude

Rude controlled the early portion of the match by using a series of ground moves, which allowed him to hit his patented DDT. Rude went for the Rude Awakening and RVD reversed into his step-over spinning heel kick. After hitting Rude with the Van Daminator and the Rolling Thunder, RVD stepped to the top rope and landed his 5-Star Frog Splash, sending the Ladies Man home.

Winner: Rob Van Dam

Match Time: 16:27


#3. Triple H vs. #14. Rowdy Roddy Piper

The match started with the Game and Piper using a series of mind games and standing in the middle of the ring before going into a matching series of right hands. Piper was able to do an atomic drop and knee lift before throwing HHH’s head into the turnbuckle. As Piper was setting HHH up for the airplane spin, the eighth wonder of the world, Chyna would enter the ring to distract the Rowdy one, allowing HHH enough time to hit his DDT. The King of Kings landed his spinebuster and finished off Piper with the Pedigree.

Winner: Triple H

Match Time: 14:29


#7. Scott Hall vs. #10. Lex Luger

The two NWO members looked confused as to why they were in the ring together in the match and began to frustrate the crowd as neither man wanted to get physical. After nine minutes of standing around, NWO Wolfpack members Konnan and Buff Bagwell attempted to get both men to play rock, paper scissors to decide a winner. After Hall wins the best two out of three, Luger was supposed to lay down to take the pin when the lights went out. A voice played over the speakers, saying “Lex Luger is Dead and now Totally Buff is here.” The lights reappear and Konnan is down on the outside and Luger has Hall in the Torture Rack. Hall is helpless and submits to the Total Package.

Winner: Lex Luger

Match Time: 15:19


#2. John Cena vs. #15. The Great Muta

Muta takes the action to Cena early in the match, using a series of kicks and high flying moves. After an attempted Green Mist misses, Cena reverses the confused Muta with a springboard stunner. After a five knuckle shuffle, Cena lands the AA and the Japanese legend is sent home in the first round.

Winner: John Cena

Match Time: 8:34

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